...............ObamaFest.............
ObamaFest
ObamaFest Team Enters Home Stretch
The Presidential Campaign Enters the Home Stretch.
The ObamaFest Team took off the last two weeks to rest up for the dash to the finish line.
Plus we hate party conventions. They're like high school pep rallies with booze. And behind the phony smiles you can see the desperation on the delegates faces, all sucking up to the candidate's inner circle in hopes of consideration for the appointments and patronage jobs that come with victory. L.A. Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa looked as pathetic as one of those guys picking up trash next to the Golden State Freeway. Can't we just make him Secretary of Unfaithful Latinos now, or is there a vetting process that would include Henry Cisneros? Hey Tony, shouldn't you be back home figuring out why over 50% of this year's LAUSD high school freshmen will drop out before graduation?
We also worked through our funk brought on by the Joe Biden VP pick. If America can survive trigger happy Aaron Burr and Dick Cheney, not to mention Doc Brown look-alike John Caldwell Calhoun, then we ought to be able to endure Joe "Bright and Clean" Biden.
The final stretch begins with Senator Obama sparring with Bill O'Reilly. On national security issues the Senator does a great job of explaining that it's not prudent for a presidential candidate to include "I will bomb Iran" in his platform.
Senator McCain, on the other hand, sings about it:
McCain Picks Sarah Palin - Joe Biden Sucks Even More
It's a shame we can't have an Obama/Palin ticket.
Talk all you want about Joe Biden's foreign policy experience, but between Biden and Palin, only Joe Biden voted for the war in Iraq.
Joe Biden Wrong Person For VP
Smarmy-ass political turd.
A lot of us boarded the Obama-train two years ago because he was a Washington outsider who was against the war.
Now he picks as his running mate the ultimate insider (in the Senate since 1973!). Christ, when Biden entered the senate America was still in Vietnam yet he still didn't have the good sense to vote against the war in Iraq.
Plus Biden is a chronic plagiarist.
Plus he's a jackass.
Forget what the ObamaFest Team said earlier. The more we've seen and heard from her the more we realize that the right pick would have been Kathleen Sebelius. When Biden shoots himself in the foot and withdraws from the ticket, we hope Obama uses his mulligan on Sebelius.
Obama's Irksome Running Mate Secret
From MSNBC:
"EMPORIA, Va - Barack Obama says he's decided on a running mate, but he won't say who. "I've made the selection, that's all you're gonna get," Obama told reporters while campaigning in Virginia Thursday. Obama didn't say whether he's informed his pick yet.How Junior High can we get?Obama is planning to announce his choice in a text message to supporters sometime before Saturday afternoon, when he's scheduled to appear with his pick in Illinois.
Asked by an Associated Press reporter when the text would be sent, Obama just grinned and said, "Wouldn't you like to know?""
And you're sending a text message to your precious $2300 clique first? Will this be concurrent with a status update on Facebook? Or a mass poke? Hey, don't forget Twitter - your VP can start this campaign as a tweet.
Please, Senator Obama, don't blow this now. The ObamaFest Team has worked too hard.
Here's all you need to know: There are Obama faithful and there are McCain faithful. Don't waste time with either. You are fighting over the great middle, swing voters who usually decide based on which candidate pisses them off the least.
This "I've got a secret" game is a blunder.
Biden for VP? Say it aint Joe, O.
Newsweek's Howard Fineman is the latest to predict:
Barring a big surprise or last-minute change of heart, the choice is likely to be Sen. Joe Biden of Deleware, chairman of the Foreign Relations Committee.Sigh. While Biden didn't make the ObamaFest VP shortlist, we get why Obama might pick the long-winded Delaweenie as a running mate. Senator Obama has been on the national scene for a short time. He doesn't have a ton of buddies. At least he's acquainted with his Senate colleagues. It's like your first quarter in the dorms when you eat every meal with the guys on your hall.
Obama Asleep on Fannie/Freddie Bailout
Senator Obama missed a great opportunity last week to stop talking and take a bold stand on the Fannie/Freddie bailout.
Senator Jim DeMint offered an amendment to the bailout that would bar political donations and lobbying by Fannie and Freddie. Makes sense. "Unseemly" is too weak a word for a system where Fannie and Freddie tuck millions into Congressional wallets while Congressmen turn around and lob billions of working men and women's tax dollars back at Fannie and Freddie. DeMint's amendment seems like a no-brainer.
But speaking of no-brainers, Senate leader Harry Reid wouldn't even allow a vote on the amendment. The current system is just too sweet for incumbents, Republicans and Democrats alike.
It will take a new voice to bring change. Somebody who can articulate how this contributes to the stench of Washington. Somebody with huge platform and built in audience who has built up enough good will to survive the arrows that will come his way. Somebody like...Senator Obama!
But so far? Not a peep.
DeMintFest anyone?
Robert Redford Cast as "The Obama Whisperer"
Shout out to Bob Redford for putting this election in perspective. Speaking in Ireland, Mr. Redford pointed out:
Word. Welcome to the world of ObamaFest, young Bob. If Obama goes down then the Democratic Party remains in the hands of same old scoundrels and idiots, including:"I think Obama is not tall on experience . . . but I believe he's a really good person. He's smart. And he does represent what the country needs most now, which is change.
"I hope he'll win. I think he will. If he doesn't, you can kiss the Democratic Party goodbye. I think we need new voices, new blood. We need to get a whole group out, get a new group in."
-The Chris Dodds and Barney Franks, both taking favors from the U.S. banks they should have been regulating, and both now crafting taxpayer bailouts of said banks.
-The Hillary Clintons and Joe Bidens, both with the blood of 4,000 U.S. soldiers on their hands, yet both refusing to apologize.
-The Harry Reids and Steny Hoyers, both possessing the most awful combination of hatefulness and incompetence.
- The Nancy Pelosi's and Rahm Emanuels, squandering the mandate of the 2006 election that gave them the power to clean up Congress. Thanks for the continued earmarks, kids, along with the continued war, deficits, housing crisis, and runaway government spending.
- And all the fucking do-nothings who simply take their fat paychecks and cushy pensions while watching the country go down the shitter. Were looking at you, John Kerry, Barbara Boxer, Dianne Feinstein, Kent Conrad, Patrick Leahy, Dick Durbin and Charles Schumer.
The point Mr. Redford is making, which we completely agree with, is that despite all of Barack Obama's electoral successes, there are not a lot of Barack Obama-types coming up behind him.
These are the stakes of this election.
Jesse Jackson Performs the Nutcutter Suite
Reverend Jackson forgot the old adage, "Don't cut off your nuts to spite your race."
And he said all this in the city he once called, "Hymie Town," an uncalled for dig at all the robotic secret agents that call Gotham home.
"99, I think he has even less of a pulse than Jesse Jackson!"
Obama Urged to call for Dodd, Conrad Resignations
"If we aren't willing to pay a price for our values, if we aren't willing to make some sacrifices in order to realize them, then we should ask ourselves whether we truly believe in them at all."
Barack Obama - The Audacity of Hope
Senator Obama needs to get started on "Change we can believe in" by calling for the resignation of these two senators:
Conrad and Dodd reap a bountiful harvest from the
garden of hypocrisy.
We find out now that Senators Kent Conrad and Chris Dodd received special loans from Countrywide Financial.
From MSNBC.com:
"Conrad obtained a $1.16 million loan from Countrywide in 2002 to buy
his vacation home, then refinanced twice through the company. Portfolio
reported that an internal e-mail from Mozilo instructed an employee to
give Conrad a 1-percent discount off his interest rate on his 2004
refinance of $1.07 million, a savings of about $10,000 a year in
interest payments."
"If they did me a favor, they did it without my knowledge and without my requesting it," Conrad said. "It's an appearance issue, but in terms of substance, I have not done one single thing wrong here."
It is impossible to believe that the Chairman of the Senate Budget Committe (Conrad) and the Chairman of the Senate Banking Committee (Dodd) did not know prevailing mortgage rates and were therefore ignorant of the special deals they received. "If they did me a favor, they did it without my knowledge and without my requesting it," Conrad said. "It's an appearance issue, but in terms of substance, I have not done one single thing wrong here."
These "Friends of Angelo" represent all that is wrong in Washington. They present themselves as "public servants" who "humble themselves" for the good of the American People when they, in fact, are getting theirs while the getting is good. The hypocrisy must end. These two must go, if for no other reason than to remind the rest of Congress that business as usual is no longer acceptable.
Obama's VP Short List
Jim Johnson is part of the stench of Washington D.C. Mr. Johnson made over $20 million running Fannie Mae, a government-sponsored but shareholder-owned company, and at the same time took special low interest loans from Countrywide Financial. We can't figure out how this behavior isn't criminal. But that's Washington.
Senator Obama erred in naming Johnson to his VP Search Team.
Now that Johnson has stepped down, the ObamaFest Team is stepping in. We'll give Senator Obama the short list he deserves.
We start with the usual suspects: Democratic Governors and Senators. We're not going to go off the board with active or retired military personnel - that's how you end up with an Admiral Stockdale-type mumbling "Who am I?" during a national debate.
Some of our disqualifiers may seem petty, like nepotism or toupees. But if you're in the same high office your father held, then your achievement is tainted. And if you think that people won't notice that you've taped a rug to your head, then you are too delusional to be a heartbeat away from The Button. And while we hate ageism in general, we do think that Senator Obama's opponent is too old to be President, and we therefore eliminate anybody older than McCain.
We'll start with Governors.
Governors Missing the Cut (reason in parentheses):
Bill Ritter –
Ruth Ann Minner –
Rod Blagojevich –
Chet Culver –
Steve Beshear –
John Baldacci –
Martin O’Malley –
Deval Patrick –
Jennifer Granholm –
Brian Schweitzer –
John Lynch –
Jon Corzine –
Bill Richardson –
David Paterson –
Ted Kulongoski –
Christine Gregoire –
Joe Manchin – West
Jim Doyle –
Dave Freudenthal –
Governors Making the Cut:
Janet Napolitano –
Kathleen Sebelius –
Phil Bredesen –
Tim Kaine –
Ted Strickland –
Brad Henry –
Here are your Democratic Senators:
Senators Missing the Cut (reason in parentheses):
Sherrod Brown –
Barbara Mikulski –
Ron Wyden –
Mark Pryor –
Edward Kennedy –
John Kerry –
Robert Casey –
Barbara Boxer –
Dianne Feinstein –
Debbie Stabenow –
Carl Levin –
Jack Reed –
Sheldon Whitehouse – Rhode Island (“A Sheldon can do your income taxes, if you
need a root canal, Sheldon's your man... but humpin' and pumpin' is not
Sheldon's strong suit. It's the name. 'Do it to me Sheldon, you're an animal
Sheldon, be my VP big Shel-don.' Doesn't work.”)
Ken Salazar –
Amy Klobuchar –
Chris Dodd –
Joe Lieberman –
Tim Johnson –
Joe Biden –
Claire McCaskill –
Max Baucus –
John Tester –
Ben Nelsen –
Daniel Akaka –
Daniel Inouye –
Harry Reid –
Patrick Leahy –
Jim Webb –
Dick Durbin –
Bob Menendez –
Frank Lautenberg –
Maria Cantwell – Washington (too much coffee)
Evan Bayh –
Jeff Bingaman –
Robert Byrd – West
John Rockefeller IV- West Virginia (“you don’t have to be a
Rockefella’ to help a fella”)
Ton Harkin –
Hillary Clinton –
Charles Schumer –
Herbert Kohl –
Byron Dorgan –
Kent Conrad –
Senators Making the Cut:
Mary Landrieu –
Patty Murray –
Bill Nelson –
Blanch
Ben Cardin –
Others Making the Cut:
Sam Nunn –
This wasn't hard at all.
Here it is, your 2008 VP Short List:
Kathleen Sebelius –
Phil Bredesen –
Tim Kaine –
Ted Strickland –
Brad Henry –
Mary Landrieu –
Russ Feingold –
Patty Murray –
Bill Nelson –
Blanch
Ben Cardin –
Sam Nunn – Co-Chair of the NTI
Unfortunately for the ladies, Obama can't pick a woman. He would be perceived, among females, as the guy who broke up with one of their girlfriends because he didn't want to get married, then turned around and got engaged to the next woman he met. It sounds ridiculous, but it's true, and Obama needs to respect the way these broads think if he wants to be President.
So Here is the True Short List:
Phil Bredesen –
Tim Kaine –
Ted Strickland –
Brad Henry –
Russ Feingold –
Bill Nelson –
Ben Cardin –
Sam Nunn – Co-Chair of the NTI
At this point we offer two choices to Senator Obama, depending on what he wants from his Vice President.
If he wants a man who looks good in the role of a President-in-waiting, he goes with Russ Feingold.
If he wants a man who is a day-to-day working asset of his administration, he goes with Sam Nunn.
Done deal. We will forward this to Caroline.
Obama Clinches Nomination - Worldwide Reaction
"...and I will be making no decisions tonight."
The ObamaFest Team experienced an emotional letdown on the night Senator Obama finally clinched the Democratic nomination for President.
Partly to blame: Mrs. Clinton's creepy non-concession speech. The junior senator from New York went all Carmella Soprano on us- she doesn't admit defeat, her husband knows people, favors are owed. Too bad for her that Mr. Clinton went from being Capo di tuttie capi to a lumbering cafone. And even with the help of his consiglieres and his big earners, she didn't have enough to go to the mattresses with Barack "Barry Oboe" Obama.
But our mood soared when, after two days of scouring the international press for worldwide reaction to Senator Obama's win, we found a pick-me-up in, of all places, Nigeria. The words are from Prof. Pat Utomi in Lagos:
The United states deserves our toast for its
infinite capacity to continue to reinvent itself. As we have said
repeatedly, Nigerians have no reason being poor and only politics of
the type of Barrack Obama championed can change culture and transform
our living conditions.
"Obama's victory must be opportunity for serious reflection. Seeing the grave irony of our House of Representatives rejecting the Freedom of Information Bill on the day a more open society saw Obama cross the tape of the Democratic Party nomination process should help us realize in Nigeria that "Urgency" of now" to use a Martin Luther King Jnr phraseology is a recognition, in kings own words that "when evil men plot, good men must plan". When evil men burn and bomb, good men must build and bind. Where evil men should seek to perpetuate an unjust status quo, good men must seek to bring into being a real order of justice." Good men and women in Nigeria must arise, draw inspiration from this Obama moment and make our country rise from the ashes of corruption, poverty and mutual distrust into the glorious future that is its potential," he said.
On to November!
Puerto Rico Helps Clinton Feel "Pretty and Witty and Bright"
Immigrant goes to America,
Many hellos in America;
Nobody knows in America
Puerto Rico's in America!
-lyrics by Stephen Sondheim
Congratulations to Senator Clinton for her victory today in Puerto Rico.
While the ObamaFest Team normally opposes Congressional earmarks, in this case we'd like to see Mrs. Clinton show proper gratitude and send that tiny island its first limousine.
Vote for the best in America,
No time to rest in America,
November test in America,
Obamafest in America!
Obama and Appeasement
Senator Obama's willingness to engage in talks with our adversaries has elicited accusations of "appeasement" and comparisons to Prime Minister Chamberlain and his accords with Hitler.
Radio Host Kevin James made the mistake of wandering down this path on "HardBall," only to get smacked down by Chris Matthews when it turns out James knew nothing about Chamberlain, the Munich Agreement, or the meaning of the word appeasement. James ends up yapping like an intellectual chihuahua, barking out from his living room window at a world he doesn't understand.
As Matthews points out, appeasement is "giving away things to the enemy, not talking to the enemy."
McCain Promises Victory by 2013
"McCain says we should win in Iraq by 2013. So we got that going for us. Which is nice."
Breaking News:
Associated Press COLUMBUS, Ohio - John McCain, looking through a crystal ball to 2013 and the end of a prospective first term, sees "spasmodic" but reduced violence in Iraq and Afghanistan, Osama bin Laden dead or captured and government spending curbed by his ready veto pen.Senator McCain's extended timetable is poignant news for these guys:
Eighth graders. War in Iraq through 2013 means that these kids will get their chance to patrol hostile streets, disarm booby traps and expose themselves to sniper fire in Bush and McCain's war of choice.
With all the sensitivity that Senator McCain has shown this election season, he has quickly become the Judge Smails of American politics:
West Virginia - Who Cares?
A Clinton precinct captain rushes a West Virginia voter to the polls.
What do you get when 32 West Virginians come together? A full set of teeth.
Hillary Clinton is already spinning her impending victory in West Virginia as reason enough for her to stay in the race. Dingleberries! Winning the hillbilly vote is no great accomplishment.
From Wikipedia:
The economy of West Virginia is one of the most fragile of any U.S. state. According to U.S. Census Bureau data, West Virginia is the third lowest in per capita income,[22] ahead of only Arkansas and Mississippi. It also ranks last in median household income.[23] The proportion of West Virginia's adult population with a bachelor's degree is the lowest in the U.S. at 15.3%.[24]
West Virginia's GDP was $55.6B in 2006, which was a 0.6% increase from 2005. This makes growth rate for the state the 2nd lowest in the nation, behind only Michigan.
Even the ObamaFest intern, who hails from West Virginia, puts little faith in the electorate. She points out the inherent dichotomy of West Virginia, "Despite their professed Christian faith, West Virginians could not find in their midst three wise men or a single virgin."
How many West Virginians does it take to eat a 'possum? Two, one to eat it and one to watch for cars.
The ObamaFest Team apologizes to the small percentage of West Virginians with internet access who may be reading this. Even though you have your monitors up on blocks we welcome you to the 21st century.
Obama's Newest Bosom Buddy: Tom Hanks
From the film Philadelphia:
It would be great if more Hollywood A-listers joined the ObamaFest, but that will never happen. As the ObamaFest intern likes to say, "Stupid is as stupid does."
Joe Miller: What do you love about the law, Andrew?Tom Hanks felt the thrill for real today when he announced his Obama endorsement:
Andrew Beckett: I... many things... uh... uh... What I love the most about the law?
Joe Miller: Yeah.
Andrew Beckett: It's that every now and again - not often, but occasionally - you get to be a part of justice being done. That really is quite a thrill when that happens.
It would be great if more Hollywood A-listers joined the ObamaFest, but that will never happen. As the ObamaFest intern likes to say, "Stupid is as stupid does."
Obama Presents Letterman Top Ten
Senator Obama took time out from campaigning in Indiana yesterday to read (via satellite) Letterman's Top Ten list. Given the turmoil of this past week, the list was surprisingly tepid and unfunny. The blame rests with Letterman's writers who, for the last few years, have been phoning it in.
We asked the ObamaFest Intern to suggest some better answers to Top Ten Surprising Facts about Senator Obama. She quickly offered:
10. Since running for president he still lathers and rinses - but no longer has time to repeat.
9. Stopped watching "Real World" after the Las Vegas hot-tub orgy.
8. Once tried to sell Hope to America - on ebay - but reserve was not met.
7. Started winning primaries after reading Oprah's copy of "The Secret."
6. Supports home state of Illinois with subsides for corn, coal and - if SB1060 passes - stuffed pizza.
5. Hopes to unite Democrats and Republicans but could care less about "those Peace and Freedom kooks."
4. Actually likes baseball's Designated Hitter rule.
3. Flummoxed that former pastor and former president are losing their marbles at the same time.
2. He only eats arugula because it's so much fun to say "arugula."
1. When asked what kind of president he will be, favorite answer is "Millard Fillmore on steroids."
Roger Waters Awes Coachella with Obama Pig
Roger Waters closed the Coachella Music Festival with the timely reminder that Senator Clinton is just another brick in the wall.
INDIO, Calif. (AP) — Roger Waters brought Coachella to a close with an epic two-set performance that included playing all of "Dark Side of the Moon" and unleashing a giant inflated pig into the night sky.Rogers had already tipped his hand when, following the Texas primary, he politely referred to Senator Clinton as ghastly:
The pig, which was led above the crowd from lines held on the ground, displayed the words "Don't be led to the slaughter" and a cartoon of Uncle Sam wielding two bloody cleavers. The other side read "Fear builds walls."The underside of the pig simply read "Obama" with a checked ballot box alongside.
Of course, nobody sets out to be ghastly. But sometimes too many harsh blows in life, too much betrayal, and your youthful idealism lies bleeding by the wayside:
There is no pain you are receding
A distant ship, smoke on the horizon.
You are only coming through in waves.
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying.
When I was a child
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye.
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown,
The dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb.
Julie Nixon Eisenhower Backs Obama
Ike and Dick share a chuckle when Julie asks, "Why can't a black man
be President?"
Senator Obama is not just blowing smoke up our kilts when he says he can unite Democrats with Republicans and Independents. The latest proof is Julie Nixon Eisenhower who supported the Obama campaign with the $2300 maximum contribution.
Clinton apologists are still not convinced. Fine. The ObamaFest Team will prove that Senator Obama is the ultimate uniter. Our top intern has set out to find a supporter named Trudy Lincoln Reagan.
Live-Blogging the Pennsylvania Debate
The ObamaFest Team has once again brought in Rocky Petralia from HelloRocky.com to Liveblog a debate. His chronicling of January's South Carolina debate set the standard for seat-of-the-pants journalism. Tonight's (4/16/08) Pennsylvania debate promises to be a dandy. - Nate
Thanks for having me back, Nate. And speaking of dandies, nice sweater vest.
7:57 - Watching Wheel of Fortune while waiting for debate to start. The finished the game early and are showing home video of Vanna's cat. Merv Griffin just rolled over in his diamond-encrusted casket.
8:00 - Charlie Gibson setting the stage. Introducing candidates. Applause from crowd. The seats all have bars - the audience looks like they are seated in a thrill ride. Hands and arms inside, people.
8:03 - Obama opens. Struck by decency of Pennsylvania people. Mentions guy in Latrobe who can't afford gas to look for a job. I've got an uncle like that, Senator - if you buy him gas he drives to a tavern.
8:05 - Clinton promises to restore our standing in the world.
8:05 - First commercial?!?? Four minutes in?
8:07 - Charlie leads off. Says candidates appeal to different constituencies. Quotes Gov. Cuomo who wants candidates to pledge now to take the other as running mate. Charlie wasn't sure whether to start with an absurd or a banal question. He went with the banal. No wonder I haven't watched ABC since they pulled Love Boat. btw- both candidates dance around the question. Nice waste of the first five minutes, Gibson.
8:12 - Gibson brings up Obama's "bitter" quote. That guy in Latrobe just popped open another Rolling Rock.
8:14 - Senator Clinton says she is granddaughter of bitter Scranton factory worker. Says she can see why people would be offended by "bitter" remarks.
8:16 - George Stephanopoulos finally speaks. Asks Clinton if she thinks Obama can beat McCain. She dances around the question like Gene Kelly with an umbrella. George asks again and she says, "Yes, Yes, Yes" but that she could do a better job.
8:18 - Obama says Clinton could also beat McCain. Adds that he is not condescending to people of faith because he is a person of faith. And he listens to gun owners. Early gun pander. I get the feeling that everybody in Penn. is packing heat.
8:20 - Clinton says she has 35 year proven record of results. That means she's been bringing it since '73. That puts her up there with Springsteen, who btw endorsed Obama today.
"Baby I got my facts learned real good right now..."
8:22 - Charlie now brings up Rev. Wright issue. I guess Charlie prepped for debate by scanning a People magazine. Stephanopoulos hasn't looked so embarrased for a colleague since Sam Donaldson got caught taking farm subsidies.
8:24 - Charlie now asks Clinton if she thinks all 8,000 members of Rev. Wright's church should have gotten up and walked out. She mentions 9/11 attacks were on "her city." Way to pick up the Guiliani indignation.
8:26 - George follows up on Rev. Wright and how Obama will handle Republican attacks on Rev. Wright. I guess you play down to your colleague's level.
8:31 - Senator Clinton says Rev. Wright issue deserves further exploration. Says "as leader's we have a choice who we associate with." Brings up Farrakhan. Charlie cuts her off before she can link Obama to Wesley Snipes tax evasion.
8:32 - George says six out of ten voters don't think Senator Clinton is honest or trustworthy. Brings up sniper fire in Bosnia issue. George must have read Charlie's People. Where are the War on Terror questions? Taxes? Government waste? Coal subsidies? I should be asking questions, not sitting here wearing one sock.
8:34 - Snuffleuphagus asks Obama if he thinks Senator Clinton has been truthful about her past. Obama says people make gaffes when they are recorded all-day, every-day.
8:37 - Charlie runs tape of some Pennsylvania broad asking Senator Obama if he believes in the American flag. Like it's the Loch Ness monster or Bigfoot. I don't know, all the pictures I've seen of the flag look grainy and doctored.
8:41 - George brings up some Weather Underground guy who Obama knows. He is a neighbor of Obama in Chicago and an English Professor. In not so many words Obama tells George to pull his head out of his ass.
8:43 - Senator Clinton jumps on this. Says Obama served on a board with Mr. Ayers. Says "Republicans will raise this issue" - nice way to excuse yourself for throwing dirt by saying the Republicans will throw dirt.
8:45 - Obama mentions that President Clinton pardoned two members of the Weather Underground. Well played, Barry.
8:46 - Charlie says he is getting out of balance. No shit, Charlie, go back to morning TV and interviewing the cast of Desperate Housewives.
8:48 - Commercial break. So the first hour goes by without a single question on a substantative issue.
8:49 - Verizon ad for wireless broadband. Like anybody with broadband would be wasting time watching ABC.
8:51 - Video question from Mandy Garber of Pittsburgh. How do we get out of Iraq? The scoreboard that tallies Good Questions reads: Mandy Garber 1; Chuck Gibson 0; Snuffleuphagus 0.
8:52 - Clinton will start withdrawing in 60 days. No more blank checks for the Iraqis.
8:54 - Charlie asks her if she is saying she knows more than General Petraus. She says that "nobody can predict what will happen as we withdraw" so there is no way she can be challenged on this. I think she just gave herself a blank check.
8:56 - Charlie asks Obama if he really can get us out in sixteen months. Obama reminds Charlie that the Commander-in-Chief sets the mission and the military executes the mission. That's how we got in this mess and that's how we'll get out.
8:59 - George turns to Iran. Should we treat an attack on Israel as an attack on the U.S? Obama says job one is to keep nukes out of Iranian hands. Believes we can offer them carrots and sticks. Why not just carrot sticks?
9:01 - Clinton talks about creating an "umbrella resistance" that goes beyond Israel. Which is fine unless it gets real windy.
9:03 - ABC goes to side stage camera angle. We see a booth above the stage with the "Deal or No Deal" banker.
9:03 - Charlie puts down phone. Tells Hillary that previous offer of Vice-President has gone down. New offer: Secretary of Interior. Hillary looks up at Gov. Rendell, Chelsea and Wesley Clark. They are shaking their heads "no". She declares, "No Deal."
9:04 - George turns to economy - says it's the number one issue on American's minds (which explains waiting an hour to get to it???). Asks if economy is still weak in a year will she still raise taxes on rich people. She says sure - people making over $250k will pay more. Charlie Gibson looks queasy.
9:05 - Obama says he will cut taxes on middle-income ($75k or less).
9:09 - Obama says 50 hedge fund people made $29 billion last year. That guy in Latrobe just switched to boilermakers.
9:10 - Obama believes in pay as you go. Don't cut taxes unless you're eliminating spending.
9:11 - Clinton says Bush has been good for rich people, but it was better in the 90's when everybody got lifted up. Camera pans crowd of bored Pennsylvanians.
9:12 - Charlie follows up strong on capital gains tax - will you pledge not to raise them? When not reading People, Charlie has been talking to his broker.
9:17 - Charlie wants to go to a commercial but he brought up Social Security so both candidates have to get in their Social Security talking points.
9:19 - Commercial Break - what is this "Divided We Fail" celebrity ad about? Aw, who cares.
9:20 - Some kid with allergies just sneezed on his mom. Children's Benedryl ad. Right, give your kids drugs. God forbid they should sneeze once in a while. And by the time that kid turns 40 he's going to need a new liver and not know why.
9:21 - Jamie Lee Curtis pitching yogurt. "Hell yes, I'll sit on this couch and eat this yogurt that makes me crap."
9:23 - We're back. Charlie says he would be remiss if he didn't mention one year anniversary of crazy Korean bastard at Virginia Tech. Axis of Evil, people. It's real. Charlie turns to gun control.
9:24 - Clinton keeps talking about "Mayor Nutter." The Beavis in me wants to laugh. Wants assault weapon ban, says cops are outgunned on streets. My idea: Since you can't take away the assault weapons, give the cops bazookas.
9:29 - Obama asked about individual gun ownership rights. Obama says local governments have rights to regulate gun ownership. Mentions legacy of hunting in America. Is against criminals and retards having guns. The criminal thing is a politically safe position, but the retard proposal alienates a lot of Texans.
9:30 - George asks Clinton if she supports D.C. gun ban. She starts to dance away from question, George makes her answer question, she says she doesn't know the facts.
9:32 - George does quick shift to affirmative action. Asks Obama about rich black kids getting advantages. Obama says he believes in affirmative action, but not quotas.
9:35 - Clinton against No Child Left Behind. For lower interest rates on student loans.
9:36 - Questions coming quick now. Charlie and George realizing they pissed away the first hour and a half.
9:37 - Charlie asks about gas prices. Clinton says markets are being manipulated. Brings up windfall profit taxes. Wonder if it would apply to the fifty New Yorkers who made $29 billion?
9:38 - Obama also calls for windfall profits tax. Wants to raise fuel standards on cars. Wants alternative energy strategy.
9:39 - George asks Senator Clinton how should would tap into President Bush once he is an ex-President. She says it would take careful thought. Obama says he would rather talk to Bush Sr.
9:40 - Charlie says one more commercial and than a final question. I wonder if anybody but me is still watching this turkey. Even that guy in Latrobe has moved on to foosball.
9:41 - Hey! The Geico caveman! Wonder who he's going to endorse. Dollars to donuts it's Nader.
9:45 - Charlie - "minute and a half each - what do you say to undecided delegates?" Clinton goes first. Says she is going to make everybody feel like they are part of the American family again. "I will tell everybody who listens that I am ready to be commander-in-chief." She shouts out to the General Clark. "You know that I will fight for you."
9:48 - Obama - "Americans had lost trust in their government. I bet on American people being tired of politicians tearing things down....change starts from the bottom up....my bet has paid off, American people have responded in record numbers...."
9:55 - Debate ends. Time for the "insta-polls" to see who won. But I already know - the real winners are the those Americans who skipped this dud and watched HSN - btw, I bought Chef Todd English's GreenPans and they rock.
Thanks Nate!
Rocky Petralia
HelloRocky.com
Tramps Like Us - Springsteen Picks Obama
Tho road to the White House goes down E Street.
Bruce Springsteen today endorsed (via his websight) Senator Obama:
Dear Friends and Fans:
LIke most of you, I've been following the campaign and I have now seen and heard enough to know where I stand. Senator Obama, in my view, is head and shoulders above the rest.
He has the depth, the reflectiveness, and the resilience to be our next President. He speaks to the America I've envisioned in my music for the past 35 years, a generous nation with a citizenry willing to tackle nuanced and complex problems, a country that's interested in its collective destiny and in the potential of its gathered spirit. A place where "...nobody crowds you, and nobody goes it alone."
At the moment, critics have tried to diminish Senator Obama through the exaggeration of certain of his comments and relationships. While these matters are worthy of some discussion, they have been ripped out of the context and fabric of the man's life and vision, so well described in his excellent book, Dreams of My Father, often in order to distract us from discussing the real issues: war and peace, the fight for economic and racial justice, reaffirming our Constitution, and the protection and enhancement of our environment.
After the terrible damage done over the past eight years, a great American reclamation project needs to be undertaken. I believe that Senator Obama is the best candidate to lead that project and to lead us into the 21st Century with a renewed sense of moral purpose and of ourselves as Americans.
Over here on E Street, we're proud to support Obama for President.
Talk about a dream
Try to make it real
you wake up in the night
With a fear so real
Spend your life waiting
for a moment that just don't come
Well, don't waste your time waiting
Badlands, you gotta live it everyday
Let the broken hearts stand
As the price you've gotta pay
We'll keep pushin' till it's understood
and these badlands start treating us good.
Obama Speaks on Race - Full Text
Not everyone has time to read Senator Obama's speech in Philly. Some prefer political Pringles, those bite-sized quotes with just enough intellectual salt to satisfy their crude ideological palates.
For them, we offer Senator McCain's words today on his Middle East swing through Jordan:
"We were very encouraged by the success of the surge and the reduction in U.S. casualties"
McCain told reporters in Jordan, where he stopped on the next leg of a
congressional visit that will also take him to Israel, Britain and
France.
McCain in Baghdad, "very pleased" to be waving to a U.S. bound transport.
For those, however, who crave more intellectual and inspiring words, enjoy the following: (full text)
“We the people, in order to form a more perfect union.”
Two hundred and twenty one years ago, in a hall that still stands across the street, a group of men gathered and, with these simple words, launched America’s improbable experiment in democracy. Farmers and scholars; statesmen and patriots who had traveled across an ocean to escape tyranny and persecution finally made real their declaration of independence at a Philadelphia convention that lasted through the spring of 1787.
The document they produced was eventually signed but ultimately unfinished. It was stained by this nation’s original sin of slavery, a question that divided the colonies and brought the convention to a stalemate until the founders chose to allow the slave trade to continue for at least twenty more years, and to leave any final resolution to future generations.
Of course, the answer to the slavery question was already embedded within our Constitution – a Constitution that had at is very core the ideal of equal citizenship under the law; a Constitution that promised its people liberty, and justice, and a union that could be and should be perfected over time.
And yet words on a parchment would not be enough to deliver slaves from bondage, or provide men and women of every color and creed their full rights and obligations as citizens of the United States. What would be needed were Americans in successive generations who were willing to do their part – through protests and struggle, on the streets and in the courts, through a civil war and civil disobedience and always at great risk - to narrow that gap between the promise of our ideals and the reality of their time.
This was one of the tasks we set forth at the beginning of this campaign – to continue the long march of those who came before us, a march for a more just, more equal, more free, more caring and more prosperous America. I chose to run for the presidency at this moment in history because I believe deeply that we cannot solve the challenges of our time unless we solve them together – unless we perfect our union by understanding that we may have different stories, but we hold common hopes; that we may not look the same and we may not have come from the same place, but we all want to move in the same direction – towards a better future for of children and our grandchildren.
This belief comes from my unyielding faith in the decency and generosity of the American people. But it also comes from my own American story.
I am the son of a black man from Kenya and a white woman from Kansas. I was raised with the help of a white grandfather who survived a Depression to serve in Patton’s Army during World War II and a white grandmother who worked on a bomber assembly line at Fort Leavenworth while he was overseas. I’ve gone to some of the best schools in America and lived in one of the world’s poorest nations. I am married to a black American who carries within her the blood of slaves and slaveowners – an inheritance we pass on to our two precious daughters. I have brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, uncles and cousins, of every race and every hue, scattered across three continents, and for as long as I live, I will never forget that in no other country on Earth is my story even possible.
It’s a story that hasn’t made me the most conventional candidate. But it is a story that has seared into my genetic makeup the idea that this nation is more than the sum of its parts – that out of many, we are truly one.
Throughout the first year of this campaign, against all predictions to the contrary, we saw how hungry the American people were for this message of unity. Despite the temptation to view my candidacy through a purely racial lens, we won commanding victories in states with some of the whitest populations in the country. In South Carolina, where the Confederate Flag still flies, we built a powerful coalition of African Americans and white Americans.
This is not to say that race has not been an issue in the campaign. At various stages in the campaign, some commentators have deemed me either “too black” or “not black enough.” We saw racial tensions bubble to the surface during the week before the South Carolina primary. The press has scoured every exit poll for the latest evidence of racial polarization, not just in terms of white and black, but black and brown